I was talking with my therapist recently about how life seems to keep circling back around to my unresolved issues. He mentioned the phrase "a funny God," which at first confused me. And then I realized he was talking about what I was talking about -- that, until you have really, truly worked through something, life/God/the universe/whatever you want to call it will keep bringing you the same situation until you work your way through it.
I moved this weekend, downsizing from an 1800 square foot house to an 850 square foot apartment. Not surprisingly, this means I now have WAY too much stuff. Stuff stacked in boxes around the apartment, stuff stacked in piles that I have to work around. Stuff that has made my home chaos.
I was staring at all of this stuff today, feeling overwhelmed and triggered by memories of growing up in a house where you couldn't actually walk straight through most of the rooms. You had to pick a path over, through, and around the piles of stuff. I felt very much like I was back with my mother, surrounded by an unmanageable chaos. And then, all of a sudden, I realize that wasn't true at all. Too much stuff, yes. Chaos, yes. But, this time around, I have the ability to simplify, discard, and organize. I have the power to make my life what I want it to be. My mother's issue no longer needs to be my issue.
A funny God, indeed.
Dude. I've got a room full of boxes I've got to get to too . . . your post inspires me. Thanks! Your right. I have the ability to simplify, discard and organize!
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I just found your blog. My mother is a hoarder but my family pretends its normal because my mom is basically an awesome person. But the hoarding is really there and its waiting for me to clean it up so that she can keep filling the spaces with more junk. So for now I give up. But I can go back to my own house and try to keep it clean. Your blog is great. I hope you keep writing. Thank you for your inspiring words.
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